Your thoughts grow the garden of your success – do you want weeds or flowers?
In line at the grocery store yesterday, I overheard a conversation between the clerk and the woman in front of me. She seemed to be having trouble with the credit card machine until the clerk reassured her it was working properly – albeit a little slowly. “Oh, that’s good. I thought I broke it. That’s usually my job – breaking things.”
YIKES!! My self-sabotage language meter spiked into the red zone! Doesn’t she realize what she’s saying? I almost wondered aloud. If that’s true, it’s no doubt a self-fulfilling prophesy. She tells herself she always breaks things, and lo and behold, she always breaks things.
We’ve talked about how our thoughts and self-talk affect our results before, but I felt compelled to write on it today, because there’s more to this story. As I was getting in my car after purchasing my own groceries, I noticed the same lady pulling out in something of a beat-up sedan. There, on the back of her car was this bumper sticker:
Whatever I might have surmised previously, the language I heard this woman use in the checkout lane wasn’t an anomaly. She probably spends her life wondering why nothing goes her way, and yet she wears the reason right there on her rear bumper: she creates that for herself!
What does this have to do with your success as an author, publisher, speaker, and expert in your field? EVERYTHING! If you’re not seeing the success you want and feel you deserve, a good place to start your examination of why is in your self-talk. What are you telling yourself, day in and day out? Are you constantly reenforcing the message that you’re a great author and people will love reading your books – or are you sending yourself little digs like, “Who’s going to want to read this anyway? There are a hundred other books on this subject all better than mine”?
The thing is, we all do it. Even those of us most practiced at positive self-talk occasionally fall into the trap of self-doubt and self-sabotaging messaging to ourselves. The thing to do about it is recognize it, and then make every effort to reprogram your neural pathways to create positive messages instead. One of the best ways you can do that is by working with a coach, mentor, or other unbiased individual who will help you notice your patterns and adjust them. Once you start making these adjustments for yourself, however, be ready to begin noticing all the other people out there who are still trapped in self-discouraging language.
Coaching can be viewed one of two ways: as an expense or as an investment. I know for a fact that the $3,000+ I spent on coaching this last calendar year has moved me forward substantially, in terms of my own expectations for myself, as well as in my results.
You certainly don’t have to hire a coach to see positive results, but doing so will help you cut your learning curve to a fraction of what it might be on your own. And if you look at almost every successful person you admire, chances are they have a coach who supports and encourages them to keep on making progress.
I read a quote yesterday that really struck me, a new take on an old aphorism: Don’t believe everything you
If your thoughts haven’t been so empowering lately, I encourage you to shake them up a bit so you start to see different results!
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Visit our website to read up on more articles on motivation and other tips for writers, including a couple from my coach, Karen Gridley – the Excuse Remover. If you need help getting out of your own way so you can write, publish, and market YOUR book, call us today for your complimentary 30-minute consultation! 602.518.5376